


Her

by BrokenCalibre



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Kylo Ren Fic, Kylo Ren Romance, kylo ren smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-11
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-26 15:29:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12061830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenCalibre/pseuds/BrokenCalibre
Summary: Kylo Ren has no vices. No indulgences. No temptations.Except her.





	Her

**Author's Note:**

> New Kylo fic, nothing major. Kinda sweet, as far as Kylo Ren goes.  
> Enjoy  
> XxX

Kylo Ren didn’t partake in many frivolities. Even before he was Kylo Ren, way back then, he hadn’t been the celebrant sort. Despite the lush nature of his father, perhaps even because of it, Kylo had never had any interest in alcohols or spices. He had inherited his mother’s more stoic nature, but even she had been partial to a night of indulgence. Perhaps Kylo had always been destined for a life of abstinence, perhaps his parents were to credit- or to blame-, but either way, Kylo Ren was perfectly content without such.

Some people, his lieutenants for example, took their pleasures in food. Many of his inferiors were victims to tight belts and greasy faces, gorging themselves at social gatherings and the like. It was always clear to see whom amongst them were in the habit of overeating, or even comfort-eating. Very few of the lesser captains could afford such decadence, but even so, it was not uncommon to see them enjoying what rations they could. Not Kylo Ren, though. No, food was too basic, too necessary for him to see it as an indulgence.

He knew of others who preferred material possessions. Back home on Chandrilla, the many politicians his mother worked alongside would outfit both themselves and their servants in the lushest fabrics known, draping themselves in jewellery and finery. Their homes, their gardens and estates, even their vehicles were decorated in symbols not only of wealth, but of opulence. Kylo had never seen the appeal in shiny baubles or silken clothes, not even as a child.

Then there were those whose indulgences were the company they kept. Expensive dancers, paid bed-mates, popular celebrities, close friends or bought friends, it made little difference. All their money went on making themselves the centre of the largest crowd they could summon. To be waited on, listened to, fawned over, fought over. It was something Kylo could easily have himself, as the Commander of the Knights of Ren, so many power-hungry individuals would fall over themselves to become part of his inner-circle, but Kylo abhorred such people.

All over the known galaxy, and likely beyond, people of all lifeforms, of all stature and religion, all had a vice. Many had several. Indulging in such vices gave them pleasure, gave them purpose, or perhaps simply gave them escape, but none of these were known to Kylo. No, he had only one vice, only one small pleasure in the world.

Her.

The pull he first felt towards her had startled him so much, he had fired her on the spot. The way her eyes widened then narrowed, shock followed by fury, still sent sparks through his body. The way she had opened her mouth to argue, but snapped it shut once she realised the futility of such a thing, still made the corners of his mouth twitch. The way she turned on her heel and stalked slowly away still made his throat tighten.

That evening he had researched her thoroughly, seeking an answer to his sudden obsession with a lowly yeoman, finding nothing remarkable about her. Recent graduate of the Academy, young but capable, beginning her career-long journey through the ranks. After he was satisfied there was nothing suspicious in her character, he reinstated her, citing a ‘clerical error’ as the reason for her termination. She had returned to work, though turned deftly away from Kylo anytime he happened to enter the room. Kylo, too, ignored her, but only for a time.

He still felt that pull, but he wasn’t stupid, he knew what it was now. Nothing remarkable. Nothing suspicious. Nothing interesting. It was just physical attraction. As pure and simple as that. He may have been a warrior, feared and respected across the galaxy, but he was still a sentient lifeform, complete with all the chemical and hormonal reactions that came with it. But he wasn’t a slave to such primal instincts. He refused to be.

At least, he tried to.

Expecting it to eventually lessen and dissipate, Kylo paid no attention to the way his mind would conjure her form at night. He ignored the dreams he had of her, of them entwined together. He pretended his gaze only lingered upon her to check her work. He imagined shoving her out of an airlock to prove to his baser self she was nothing special. Just a women that his lingering adolescence found aesthetically pleasing. Just a tiny cog in the mighty machine that was the First Order, a cog that wouldn’t be missed if it suddenly disappeared. That’s what he told himself.

Except, when she did suddenly disappear, he did miss her.

The first few days she wasn’t there when he passed her workstation, he assumed she was unwell. After a week, he wondered if she had been reassigned. After two, he decided to investigate.

While on leave, she had been captured by the Resistance. And, as tiny a cog as she was, no rescue efforts had been issued. It was possible she was already dead.

Nevertheless, Kylo took a leave of absence of his own.

Tracking her movements had been simple; all officers must specify any and all ports of call while on leave. She had gone home to Coruscant, visited her parents, then vanished. Kylo picked up the trail of her last known whereabouts, identified a suspicious vehicle as a Resistance freighter, which he then followed to a space station on the outer rim.

Beneath the main sectors of the station, Kylo found First Order captives imprisoned within a privately owned storage hold. She hadn’t been among them, but he freed them anyway. A short firefight occurred not long after, Kylo dispatching his attackers with ease. He left one alive, to probe for information. Higher priority captives had been relocated to a ‘refurbishing programme’ further below.

She was there. So were three others, but Kylo barely even noticed them.

She had given away no information, not that she was privy to particularly sensitive data, but her loyalty pleased Kylo greatly. The other captives hadn’t been as trustworthy, and Kylo repaid their disloyalty in kind, before dealing with their captors.

Her, he took back with him.

She said little on the journey back. She ate, showered, then slept. Kylo watched her dreams. He was in them. She was glad to see him. He granted her another leave of absence for her troubles, and a large financial bonus for her loyalty, but she chose to spend her time off still aboard the Finalizer. Kylo kept a close eye on her while she recovered, watching her with his mind whenever he had a free moment. She was on edge, easily spooked, and wasn’t eating. Her sleep was interrupted with nightmares and cold sweats. All this, Kylo watched, and did nothing.

Until she called for him.

He wasn’t sure why he had awoken so suddenly. A sharpness in his chest suggested danger, but he was alone in his quarters. He thought it had been a nightmare, immediately forgotten upon waking, but then he felt it again. The call. His name. Her voice.

The nightmare was hers. Unable to wake, her mind cried out for her rescuer, the only one that could save her. He went to her. Panicked, she clung to him in a half-asleep fugue, sweat and tears soaking into his shirt. All he could do was let her ride it out, so he did. He held her in silence, waiting for her to calm. When she did, she fell asleep again, too exhausted to dream. Kylo let her sleep, and returned to his own bed.

She woke quickly the second time it happened, trembling in his arms, her words muddled and apologetic. Kylo shushed her gently, laid her back down to sleep, and left.

He didn’t go to her the third time, instead pushed into her mind and wiped the nightmare away. He replaced it with a quiet dream of reading books on a rainy afternoon. He stayed in her mind until he was sure the nightmare would not return, and even then, he was hesitant to leave. But he forced himself to pull away, not matter how hard she had tried to cling on to him. When he returned to his own mind, in his own body and bed, his chest felt full in a way it hadn’t in years.

His attraction to her had faded, but in its place grew something far more powerful: affection.

When she returned to work, he stopped by her station, saying nothing as he assessed her mood. She was glad to be back, but still nervous, shaken by her experiences. She felt unsafe, even aboard the flagship of the First Order, surrounded by guards and ‘troopers. The only time she relaxed was in his presence. So, he promoted her.

With her new job, came a new work station, on the same deck Kylo Ren stood sentinel every day. Her nerves calmed, her confidence returned, and he got to see her whenever he pleased. She began to smile to herself when she looked at him, unaware that he was looking at her too. She started to preen herself a little more each day before reporting for duty, nothing fancy, but enough for him to notice. A small clasp in her hair. Powder applied to her eyelid. Soft colour outlining her lips.

As if Kylo needed another reason to stare at her.

They never spoke beyond professional courtesy. They never interacted on a personal level. And yet, they grew closer over the passing weeks and months. Soft smiles and lingering glances, despite all his being hidden behind his mask, were enough to endear them to one another. Kylo knew it could not continue, but never fought it. He allowed it to happen, allowed her to become his only vice, but never allowed anything more. He let himself feel, but not act. Stare, but not speak. Dream, but not plan.

Of course, that all changed.

This time, the nightmare was his.

This time, he called for her.

This time, she held him.

And this time, he spoke.

_‘Stay.’_

One word formed of a thousand silent prayers.

She stayed. She fell asleep in his arms, and he in hers. When he awoke, she was still there, her soft breath fanning out across his chest, one arm spread over his torso, the other curled around her own where her hand was clasped in his, his own arm wrapped underneath her and around her waist. With his free hand, he brushed her hair from her face, content to watch her sleep peacefully.

When it was time to wake her, he pulled her closer against him, and pressed his lips to her forehead. Her eyelashes fluttered, her smile dimpling her cheeks, and he kissed her again. She let out a soft sigh, and peered up at him with a sleepy smile. He couldn’t help but smile back.

She returned to her own quarters to prepare for the day, and they met again on the main deck. Beneath the mask, Kylo’s cheeks flushed when she glanced at him shyly, pleasure fizzing in his stomach. His own features hidden, he nodded to her, feeling the whorl of happiness that shimmered inside her that such a small gesture.

Physical attraction turned sincere affection.

He watched her more often after that, no longer captivated by her form, but by her spirit. When he was away on missions, he sought her out within the Living Force, unable to truly reach her, but able to sense her, and confirm her safety. When he returned, he let his mind coil around her own as she slept, content to guard her dreams. And when she came to his quarters, completely of her own accord, he didn’t hesitate to pull her inside, bringing her lips up to his.

He had never kissed someone in such a manner. As a youngling, his emotions were too raw to be encouraged, and as a young man they had been actively supressed. What few romantic experiences he had were sparse and wanting, giving him no pleasure or incentive to seek them out again. Until now. Until her.

He had never felt wanted the way she wanted him. His soul suddenly seemed to accept itself, dismissing all the times in his life he had ever felt unworthy, unwanted, unloved. All was right, inside and out, in a way Kylo had never known.

All because of her.

Shaking with the power that surged within him, he pulled her closer and closer, their bodies pressed tightly together. His hands gripped at her coat, hers trailed over his shoulders and into his hair. He groaned when she tugged the ends into her fist, wrenching himself away from her to rid her of her clothes. She eagerly returned the favour, clawing at layer after layer, until skin met skin, then lips met skin, and she was quivering as he brought her down onto his bed.

He pushed inside her urgently, his pulsing cock sinking in deep. The groan Kylo let out was inhuman, and she gasped underneath him, her head tilted back, her neck calling to his teeth. He bit into the taut flesh, and she cried out, hips bucking into his. His name was a strangled whisper on her lips, her voice cracking as her ravished her body, taking all that he could. In the back of his mind he wanted to be patient and loving, but the animal that had taken control of his body had no time to waste on such things.

He took and took, biting and sucking, every desperate cry she made only spurring him on. His hands grabbed and squeezed, her shoulders, her breasts, her hips, her thighs, her ass, pulling all of her closer as his cock drove harder and harder into her. Sweat beaded on his forehead, dripping from his face to her chest as he sucked the soft flesh of her collarbone into his mouth. He wanted to see it marked, to see _her_ marked. Bruises that could only mean one thing. He wanted her covered in them. By the time he came, his seed spilling deep inside her, his voice was hoarse, his lips swollen, but he wasn’t done.

He pulled out of her, ignoring the soft whine she let out at his absence, and hooked his elbows underneath her knees, bringing her wet pussy to his tongue. He could taste himself, his cum mixed with her own lubrication, and her back arched as he ate her pussy hungrily. He forgot about her pleasure, only wanting to taste her, to consume all she had to offer. Her voice continued to call his name, and he was vaguely aware of her orgasm, his focus on the fresh flood of juice surging onto his tongue. Once he had licked her clean, he dropped her bottom half back down onto the bed, panting. He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and forearm, then towered over her again.

Running a finger from her temple to her chin, Kylo’s eyes mapped every inch of her face. Her glistening eyes. Her open lips. Her sweat covered brow. The soft tip of her nose. The smooth line where her jaw met her neck. He took it all in, blinking slowly as the maddened haze of lust dissipated from his soul. He counted the bruises forming across her torso: two on her left collarbone, one over her right nipple, two more on her right hip, along with his handprints, small crescent cuts where his nails had dug into her.

He kissed each injury softly, as an apology he wouldn’t say aloud. He wasn’t truly sorry. No, if anything, he was proud. Pleased with himself at creating such art.

It was then she finally spoke, thanking him as she guided his lips up to hers. He wasn’t sure what she was thanking him for, but he accepted her kisses eagerly. The next words she whispered went straight to his recovering cock, asking him for more.

_‘Do it again, Kylo.’_

So he did. Over and over, his stamina long outlasting hers. She fell asleep in his arms, her body spent, covered in imprints of him. His hands, his teeth, his tongue, his lips. Sweat, saliva, and semen dried over her skin, the scents mingling in Kylo’s nose as he breathed deeply. When he closed his eyes, he could relive it all over again. Her face when he opened the door. Her voice when she cried out his name. Her pussy when it contracted around his cock in orgasm. And now, her body asleep beside him. Safe in his bed, in his arms.

Kylo felt safe too.

When morning came, they each did too. The day’s work went undone, unimportant compared to what they had discovered in each other. They cleaned each other off in the refresher, then dirtied each other back up in the bed. Kylo ignored all attempts to reach him, his focus only on the pleasure he had found at last. Droids brought them food and refreshments throughout the day, the only interruption Kylo allowed. As they ate, they talked, in a way Kylo hadn’t talked in a long time. No great secrets were shared, yet they felt much closer by the end of it. An understanding began to form between them, and a mutual contentment.

‘ _You feel it too.’_

The final time their bodies joined that day, Kylo had finally found time for the patience his mind had been calling for. He took his time, filling her up and tipping her over the edge. He kissed her slowly, paying attention to the way her mouth shaped itself against his, yielding to him without needing to be told. He listened to the way her breath hitched, then rushed inwards, spilling back out full of his name. He counted every time her hips bucked upwards, when he bit down on her neck, when he pulled at one of her nipples, when he pressed his thumbs into her pelvis. He catalogued it all, storing the information away in a branch of his mind he could only think of as ‘ _Her_ ’.

He didn’t sleep at all that night, knowing she would finally have to leave come the morning. He just breathed, his eyes closed, and listened to her heart beating steadily. When his alarm beeped twice, she stirred against him, her eyelids fluttering as she looked up at him, smiling. Her clothes had been laundered and returned to Kylo’s quarters by one of the protocol droids, but she coaxed him into a shower first.

They kept it quick. As soon as the water turned on, Kylo swept her into his arms, pressing her back against the warming tiles, lifting her legs around his waist. He slid into her with ease, the previous tightness of her vaginal walls more accommodating now that they memorized his length and girth. She gasped and sighed as she always did, whispering his name as he pounded into her ceaselessly. He pushed and pulled, head buried in her neck, his lips vibrating every time her vocal chords rumbled deep in her throat.

He let her cum first this time, waiting until her muscles had spasmed and then gone slack before allowing himself to follow her to orgasm. He let out a sharp rush of breath as he came, her fingers coiling into the tips of his hair, pulling just enough to set his nerves on fire. If his body had been capable, he would have climaxed again from the sensation, instead he dug his own fingers into the underside of her thighs, her legs still wrapped tight around his waist, and murmured her name.

The smile she gave him once they were dressed was almost shy, as if the bubble around them had burst. Kylo didn’t have to look inside her mind to know what she was thinking; she was afraid it was over. He was afraid too. Who decided? What did he have to say or do to make sure this wasn’t the end? For once, his mind was blank. She seemed to take it as rejection, and turned away from him to depart.

He reached out, taking her hand in his, gloves already on, helmet under one arm.

_‘I’ll see you tonight.’_

He fought the instinct to let the statement sound like a question, keeping his voice even. But it wasn’t an order either. It was hope. He reworded the sentence.

_‘I hope I’ll see you tonight.’_

She smiled at him, the apples of her cheeks flushing, and nodded.

He stepped closer to her, and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead, but she tipped her head up to look at him, silently asking for more. He gave it to her, his hand sliding to the back of her neck to hold her to him, their lips locked in a slow kiss. When they parted, her eyes shone with excitement, and his stomach churned in anticipation, both looking forward to their reunion later that evening.

From then on, she was his only vice, the only temptation he allowed himself to succumb to. Whenever and however he wanted her, she was there to be taken, cleaving to him like she was made for him. She gave him pleasure, purpose, and escape. Whether he was celebrating a new victory, or commiserating a defeat, she gave him comfort and eased his pain. She became part of him, a part he never knew he was without.

A part of him he’d never be without again.

Her.


End file.
